I'd lost a friend a year ago, the first and hopefully he'll be the last in my life, to a disease till now still unable to find cure to it's victims. The name of the disease is AIDS. He had developed into full-blown AIDS since October in 2002 and lived on for another 8 months. We were at his ward that day, bringing his twin brother, Ming with us to pay him a visit, knowing him might not survive long as we'd seen it a day before. And funny enough, we were discussing about celebrating his 36th birthday a little earlier as it's fall on 25th July the same day when the doctors reluctantly told us there was nothing more to be done.. He has gone that night, 09Jun2003 at 2115 hour with no one by his side, completely alone.At the funeral, I have never thought of that I would cry. His coffin was sealed off as requested by law. And there are relatives, friends, his parents and sibling. This is my first time to have met his mother. She sat there and looked sad. I must agreed that every individual people deal with grief in their own ways and within their own time, but guidance and support from others can help ease the journey. I went over to talk to her and she was sobbing with grief and she'd said "I'd lost my son." For the next few minutes, shaking with tension and overwhelming grief, I tried to hold back the tears and walked away as I can't face his mother any longer, who'd uttered these heartbroken words, and in a voice hoarse from weeping, tears began to fell from my eyes.
At the cremation the next day, the ceremony is simple and solemn. And there she is, his mother standing by the side of where he is lying, trying to lift the coffin's cover up, perhaps trying to have a last glimpse of her beloved son who has left her without saying a word but unsuccessful. As the coffin slowly subsided, she looked helplessly eyeing the coffin vanished into the flame. I wrote down this story to share my own experiences of learning how to cope, to reach out and to move on. And hopefully this will provide solace, insight and connection with others who have walked this powerful yet transformational path. Words of encouragement and companionship are needed when time arises and they go straight to the heart. I hoped that it wouldn't happen again. I won't let this incident be forgotten.
"Lets us take a journey to the heart. Even if you are not presently dealing with grief, hopefully, this little story of mine will move you and remind you of what really matters in our life. Most important, to be more deeply appreciate life through the grieving process, in times like these that open our hearts and lead us back into loving arms."
